We are still in Beta.

It’s coming to an end; my junior year is. I’ve grown a lot this year, but I don’t feel like life will be any different going into my senior year. I’ve grown really close to some friends, and farther apart from others. One more year and then we will all be going our separate ways. It’s a sad thought. I don’t really want a lot of my friends to leave, I think there is something about high school friendships that just, I don’t know, but it’s a friendship that you can’t ever have the same way after high school. I hate thinking about not seeing some people ever again, but I know that God is there and will help me deal with it.

Prom is in less than a week and I have no date and no idea what to wear. I want to go but then again I don’t really. I wish I was going with someone but it almost seems pointless to go with someone unless it’s the person I want to go with. Life is like that yah know? It’s to late to ask anyone anyway, or that’s what I keep saying to myself. I also keep saying, “give it time, next year, next year” but I don’t know if it will be next year or ever for that matter. Hence why I sit and listen trying to trust in God and his guidance.

I hope I’m listening well.

Theatre class makes you think. That’s what I have decided. The other day we had to do a scene/dance/theatre piece/song/art’s school thing about this poem we got. Anyway, after about 45 minutes of my group discussing it trying to pull something juicy out of it, we got an idea. From there, it was like a tiny bowl of bubbles, being blown into by a straw, creating more and more and more, ever expanding.

Anyway, the poem was called “End of Summer”. While reading it we all agreed to focus on the section that includes this

“and the sparrows
shattering to nowhere are the Summer
waving that here is where it turns”

Now our idea was to focus on the word nowhere. From there we all came up with ideas and over the process of it, we hit gold. Or I felt like we did, or… I felt that I did. See….. in our scene thingy we had one of the students sitting in the middle, just staring, then two others come in, arguing and saying lines from the poem at each other. Meanwhile I am on stage grabbing at anything, but I can’t hold it. I’m just grasping air. Nothing. Finally another group member comes in, she’s singing “glasses and silver, glasses and silver” while playing imaginary hopscotch. I pause, stare at her. “She’s found it” I think; Nowhere. Meanwhile the other members yell and fight, and one just sits and stares.

That was basically what our piece was. Now it wasn’t exactly as I wanted it, but it worked. Basically the idea I came up with, went like this. The poem was talking about childhood. It is talking about the End of Summer, or the end of your childhood, or in a sense, nowhere. See the group member on the ground, he was nowhere. He was representational of that, or so I thought. The two arguing members, they are the world, the “real” world so to speak. And the girl? The girl has found nowhere, she’s in it, without knowing it. As for me, I’m looking for nowhere. See it’s…. it’s this magical thing, this place…. I don’t know what I’m looking for, I just, I know I am. I know I should be, I reach out, trying to grab it, but can’t. The girl, she is in it, I see that, but don’t know it, while… at the same time… I do.

See… in a sense, nowhere, is everywhere. Well. Nowhere, is where you want to be. If that makes sense. See we spend all this time trying to leave childhood, trying to grow up, get to the “real” world. Which is just filled with sadness and despair and stress, but nowhere… nowhere is joy, nowhere is happiness, nowhere is pure bliss. So that’s why I was searching, yet I didn’t know it. It’s interesting because, see the fact is, that….we all get so focused on life, that we lose sight of real life, being nowhere. Jesus said

“I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” (NIV)

or in The Message version

“I’m telling you, once and for all, that unless you return to square one and start over like children, you’re not even going to get a look at the kingdom, let alone get in. Whoever becomes simple and elemental again, like this child, will rank high in God’s kingdom.”

See, Jesus was a wise man, I mean… he was Jesus. He knew what he was talking about when he told us to be like a child. Or in the Message version he says “Whoever becomes simple and elemental again:. I like that. I want to go back to being simple. I want to go back to being elemental. I would like to go back to being in love with having fun, and even more so, I would love to go back to being in love with God’s creation. So that’s what I’m praying for. God to make me like a child again. God to bring me to nowhere, and for me to enjoy it.

See you nowhere.

**Warning the post below is a joke. The viewpoints expressed in the post below are in no way connected to the thoughts of the author. Please don’t hold anything against him, even though he is the creator of the thoughts. The purpose is to make you laugh, not get mad. Thank you**

So I’ve solved the worlds problems. Basically it came about during a communications class. See we were doing persuasive essays, or debates. So I decided that there are 2 ways to solve all of these problems. The first and simplest way, is to take humans out of the equations. See there wouldn’t be so little salmon if we hadn’t built all the dams. Which then when we needed salmon, and the sea lions started eating them, we wouldn’t have to kill the sea lions, or not have enough salmon.

Another example is assisted suicide. Should it be legal? Well it doesn’t matter if their are no humans who want to kill themselves, or doctors who wanted money.

Then there is the most obvious fact being, that we couldn’t debate (argue) about these topics if humans didn’t exist. Thus take humans out of the equation and the world would be perfect.

So the other idea I came up with was this.

So to start with, there are to many nuclear weapons and we are afraid of starting wars. So to get rid of the nuclear weapons we just have to bomb the Wal-Marts. See there are also to many Wal-Marts, which are putting small businesses out of business. Now this also solves a few extra problems. See Wal-Mart is an equal opportunity employer. This means they will employ anybody equally, rapists, murderers, illegal immigrants, thieves, and kidnappers. So we blow up the Wal-Marts and we get rid of these people, Wal-Mart and Nuclear Weapons. This then causes radiation. Which will cause diseases and surely terminally ill patients. So the people who survive the Wal-Mart bombings will either die painfully, or have to be administered drugs to help them die. Unluckily the USA will have made it illegal for a doctor to perform assisted suicide, so the Mexicans and Canadians will be practicing it instead. So all of these people who worked at Wal-Mart and now have Terminal illnesses will have to go to Mexico or Canada or some other country. So the Mexicans and Canadians and people of other country’s who are coming to America illegally, because they can’t find jobs will have jobs assisting suicides. Unfortunately the US will also have raised the driving age to past 25, because our brains don’t develop till at least 25, and then we need some practice. So no one can drive to these places to get the “help” they need at killing themselves. So, they will have to ride whales. This in turn will solve 2 more problems. It will save the whales from whale hunting, and while riding whales the people can shoot the Sea Lions eating our salmon. Thus problems solved. Now what about the Myspace debate? and Teacher Dress code? You might ask. Well I will tell you. We will use Myspace to plan this entire operation, and make sure everyone is wearing the right clothes at the same time. Not to uncomfortable, not to distracting, but just right. Now the world is at peace. And thus, the end of my theory on how Myspace will solve our world problems.

Joshua 3:5

“the LORD will do amazing things among you.”

Amen to that! Recently I’ve gotten to see lots of God at work. From Bible Studys, Blessings, to friends, problems, miracles and more. It’s been amazing! I’ve learned that A. God answers prayers B. Friends can help and C. God is amazing! Oh and just so you all know, it would be great if you could pray for me cause I started a Bible Study (small group) and I need help! I kinda just went with God and I know it’s what he wants me to do, but I have never lead a small group/Bible Study before. So pray that he gives me wisedom and leadership. Recently also I’ve been really connecting with God through music. I now have 2 David Crowder Band CD’s and I love them! I really really want to go to a huge event like ATF, DYC, IYC, or just a concert where I can just jump and dance, scream, yell sing and just praise God. Unluckily ATF (Aquire the Fire) isn’t till April! So if any of you know of other concerts or anything coming up I would love to know! God sure is amazing though and he does answer prayer, even if it takes 9 months, or more.

P.S.-Haha, I guess I am clumsy! I kept wondering why no one was posting on this post! I kept seeing it, but no one else was, that’s why! I just realized that if I head to my site on a different computer it won’t show this post (wouldn’t) becuase I had it as private…. oops! Clumsy me.-

Hey I FINALLY got the Winter Formal Pictures online!
Here’s a link.

http://picasaweb.google.com/spencercarson/WinterFormal

Ok that was crazy cool. I went almost 2 whole weeks without touching the computer. I started Monday the 9th and just got on today. I did have to check my email once, because someone from church was emailing me a script and Saturday I made an exception when trying to contact people to go to Golden Skate. Other than that I didn’t touch it and the extra day was because I of those times. It was pretty crazy not using it, but it really was rewarding. I would challenge everyone to try it. If you don’t have a problem with using the computer to much though then I would challenge it to be someting else. TV, Video Games, The Telephone. Whatever it is, just try it it’s really rewarding.